Month: September 2019

Broadjam Artist: Alan Lee Carpenter
Song: Heartless Parade

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: Man, this one is great! An original title, fantastic lyric and yet another stellar vocal performance. I was curious to hear all the California references because based on the other songs I assumed you were working out of the UK (I try not to look up too much about the artist/writer prior to reviewing so I'm not swayed by a bio or other peoples' thoughts on the music). This track has more of a modern indie band vibe, a little Seattle / Portland thing like The National, but still holding on to the pop sensibility and production. Your voice continues to be a home run for me, and this song really establishes more of your personality and lyric prowess. I do see this one working in sync as well, though it may be a more specific "yes this is perfect for the scene" thing, which really can take time but pay off greatly in the end. Production is stellar. Keep on this path, it's just a question of you writing "the" song. This one and "Roommate" to me establish your unique voice the most.

Quote From Pro: A fascinating, smart lyric about love and loss and regret delivered by a great vocalist with true pop sensibility. A must listen for music supervisors and song lovers across the board.

Broadjam Artist: Alan Lee Carpenter
Song: Reaching Out of Reach

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: The melody and lyric of "Reaching Out of Reach" is not as compelling as "Roommate". I think you got a bit philosophical here, which puts this more as an album cut than a super-accessible single. It's a tougher one-time listen. I was thinking more about what you were trying to say rather than getting lost in the track. Per the others, the vocal is stellar. You are a really really good singer, ready for the radio and sync. This one lost me a little lyrically, but I think it would work for a full album. It might be a tougher television pitch because of the less-focused lyric, but once again the production is spot-on and professional, so you never know. Overall, I'm a fan of what I'm hearing from you. I wonder if more of a repeat of the title hook (perhaps as a melodic post hook) could make this one connect more. It's darn close as is, but not quite there.

Quote From Pro: There's hope and confusion in this well-produced and performed track that falls somewhere between '80s throwback pop and modern atmospheric crooners like Troye Sivan.

Broadjam Artist: Alan Lee Carpenter
Song: Roommate

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: This is my favorite one so far - the title is fascinating, I wanted to hear it right away. I really love the vocal, I assume it's you? If so, you've got a voice that I think will work extraordinarily well for sync. This song is so atmospheric and current sounding that you should submit to as many opportunities as you can on that front. It reminds me both production and vocal-wise of Troye Sivan. It feels very English, which makes it more exotic for us here in America. I don't hear any changes on mix or lead vocal. Songwriting wise, again, I would love to see your lyric, but most came through easily and I found it compelling and imaginative. You really captured the longing and emotion of not wanting to be alone. My favorite so far. Great work, at a competitive writing and production level. Writing songs like this one - with a unique title and very good vocal performance - will get you where you want to go.

Quote From Pro: A beautiful song of hope and longing a la Troye Sivan. Ready for its sync close-up, "Roommate" is delivered by a stellar lead vocal and gorgeous production.

Broadjam Artist: Alan Lee Carpenter
Song: Reading Between The Lines

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: I really like this one a lot - it feels like it could be an 80s Erasure/Depeche Mode synth pop track or a modern song by Ed Sheeran. Once again, I don't like the fade on the track. It's just not as common any more and I think you are selling your hooks short by fading them out. The fade works here better than it does on the other tune, but I still think you should avoid them for pitches right now. This is a very strong vocal performance. A lovely vibrato and a lot of emotion in this take. This is a stronger mix overall, no changes needed. Once again, I like that you establish your hook right at the top. I wouldn't mind a bit more development lyrically in your chorus. I would also love for you to send lyrics along with your submissions so I can dig in a bit more on the tune. Overall, this is great craftmanship. It's not right on the nose for current pop radio, but I do think it's awesome for sync pitches and if you are the artist, ready for release. Moving, interesting and well produced and mixed. Just the right hint of sadness and hope across the board. It's nice to see you can be technical and emotional. That's hard for a lot of songwriters.

Quote From Pro: A lonely song of longing and hope, sung extraordinarily well and mixed ready for a break-up scene in your favorite teen television drama.

Broadjam Artist: Alan Lee Carpenter
Song: Too Far Down the Line - Female

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: I really enjoyed this listen. I like that you set up the hook right at the top. Your singer sings this one like she really means it, and that emotion carries this track very well. If anything it's a little long. The easy way to fix this is to shorten your musical breaks and solo. The lead guitar is way too loud in the mix as well. I would not fade out the way you did, let that chorus ring out a full one more time. Fade isn't happening much anymore on the radio, and this fade feels really forced. I was just rocking out and suddenly it disappeared almost like something was wrong with my speakers. Let it rock! You may want to consider a brokendown chorus to get into the song, and possibly a half chorus, giving you more space to vamp at the end. Nice work overall. I would listen again.

Quote From Pro: Halfway between female empowerment and a moving on song, "Too Far Down the Line" is a great melody and awesome vocal you'll be singing along to before the first chorus is over. It feels both modern and familiar, and would be a great addition to a modern female country record, or a positive television/film scene.

Broadjam Artist: Paul Reidy
Song: In that moment

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Elizabeth Elkins (Songwriter)

Pro General Comments: The emotion behind this song is unfortunately something we may all have to face (if we haven't already). My concerns with this song are mostly that it feels outdated - it feels more like the folk artists of the 1960s, or even Carole King from the 1970s, which are a tough sell these days. However, I do really like the emotion in it. The music, however, feels pretty positive against a very sad lyric. The chorus lyric feels well done to me, it's clear and both resigned and sad and hopeful at the same time. I don't know if there's a place for this genre as is right now. It's far from modern pop or country, but could find a home in the indie folk/singer/songwriter/Americana world. If you are an artist yourself, I think this is a good tune to be performing out that will likely get a heartfelt audience response. It's not a song for pitch in commercial music though.

Quote From Pro: A well-written and sentimental look at how quickly life passes.