Broadjam Artist: Mary P. Carter
Song: Disconnected (vocals)
Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Robert Dellaposta (Writer, A&R, Publisher)
Pro General Comments: Mary, I really liked your vocal...you are showing a lot of improvement...the melodies are all well crafted...catchy and memorable...the sound of the drum machine is hurting the song...the piano is OK but nothing great...your vocal is the best part of the song...try to avoid cliches where possible...old lines that have been used in thousands of other songs won't get you noticed as a creative songwriter...I like the hook...one word hooks are good...the song has a retro groove and feel...good rhyme good meter and good phrasing...a few more details might help the story line...the demo sounds very basic...If you want to pitch this to movies and television or to a major artist the instrumental has to be stronger in my opinion...the drums are really thin and sound like a basic drum machine program that comes with a keyboard...even with the thin demo the song sounds pretty good because of your vocal...good job...
Quote From Pro: Mary has the soul and emotion of a classic R&B singer from the 60's. Her melodies are catchy and memorable and will touch the heart of everyone who lived through the early Motown years. She is constantly improving her craft.
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