Broadjam Artist: Dave Schnur
Song: Lipstick Lies
Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Doug Diamond (Music Supervisor, Engineer, Producer, Composer )
Pro General Comments: Hey Dave -Thanks for letting me know about your song, "Lipstick Lies". I've enjoyed listening to it and have a few ideas for you. The song puts me in-mind of some other Country-Rock or even Southern Rock groups like those I mentioned in the similar artists line.In general, I do like this song quite a bit. The instrumentation and performances, as well as the recording and mix are spot-on for this type of music, so kudos for great work on those elements. Great guitar solo too! So from an arrangement, performance and production standpoint I think this song is really good and very strong. I also think an instrumental version, as sort of a Country-Rock jam might be fun to just listen to -- as well as would be very synch licensable too - like for instance, source music in a bar scene or something (with a band playing your tune on-screen). I can definitely see that working well.As far as constructive criticism, there are few things I am hearing from a music supervisor standpoint that I think would need to be addressed for this song with lyrics/vocals to be a serious contender in the synch licensing world. I like the lyrics in general and the only thought there I had was that perhaps the line "Lipstick Lies" should be repeated a second time after you say it once at the end of the chorus. So, for instance you sing the line the one time, then currently there is a 4-bar instrumental section / turnaround before the next verse. I'd like to hear "Lipstick Lies" sung again right there for a second time to reinforce the idea that this girl is lying and being deceitful. You want to bring more attention to that idea, I think. So, that's really just a performance issue a bit as well as a slight lyrical change nothing serious. The main issue I have overall with this song is the lead vocals. While I do think the vocals are strong enough to get the idea of across to the listener and perhaps even to another artist who might be interested in recording this song (with you as the songwriter) and making it their own, I don't think the lead vocals are strong enough performance and pitch-wise to greatly help this song get the traction it deserves. I would consider trying to pitch this song to other artists you respect and/or hire a session singer or someone else you know who might be able to help you really dial-in the vocals and make them more of the star of the show. With this current vocal, while they are ok, I don't think it suits the song as well as it could. I like this song from the male perspective, but I think with just a few adjustments, a woman could just as easily sing this song, so I don't think you're limited to just another male vocal.Anyway, don't take any of that the wrong way, I'm just trying to help you get the most out of your song and I think you have a excellent start here for sure. Find yourself a really great, killer lead singer for this tune and you will have a song that others in the industry will really take notice of (in my opinion). Again, as-is the instrumental would be highly synch licensable for the right situation, so you could pursue that at any point. The key is finding the right music supervisor with the exact spot open in a film or TV show that this song would fit in (the hard part!).Ok? Hope that helps and thanks again. Feel free to contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org with any additional comments or questions.Thanks,Doug
Quote From Pro: "Lipstick Lies" is a really great Country-Rock jam tune with an excellent feel, good lyrics, and a great overall vibe.
Broadjam Artist: Dave Schnur