WAY BACK by Toby Tune

Toby Tune

Broadjam Artist: Toby Tune
Song: WAY BACK

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Alex Johnston (Music Supervisor, Composer, Producer)

Pro General Comments: This is an upbeat piece that creates a good mood. There are syncopated and counterpoint patterns and rhythms that make the arrangement interesting. Its starts with the almost arpeggiated piano chords, over a long legato cello which immediately sets of the arrangement. The brass phrase off set against the Erhu that sounds like the chinese violin is a unique way of delivery. Pan pipes join with a counterpoint melody that catches the ear and helps to evoke a different feeling, then whole thing then joins together for a nice dynamic crescendo before it drops with what appear to be tubas or French horns and a small filtered drum loop plays in the left ear as if anticipating more coming, ust before the powerful drums kit in and again we have another dynamic lift. So a really good set up musically and dynamically. The song it is most powerful at this point and with extra kick drum added it feel like the songs is riding on a across the chinese grasslands headin for the sun and then a nice SFX ending. My only thoughts are this. Dont be too clever in arranging pieces, remember that a lot of Music Supervisors are not all top notch musicians and arrangers so they might see it as too complicated or not understand it, but Stick to you principles.The other main thought is if you hired a trumpet player and a violist rather than used sample banks that would have made the song 60x better in its quality of sound and it would sound amazing, its worth spending a little bit on friends you know who might play but would really help it to stand out and in the industry in every level people are trying to be noticed and different you have the chance to with a few changes.Overall and enjoyable listen with choice of instrumentation excellent and a clever yet tricky arrangement.Nice WorkMuch LoveAlexCMI Music Group

Quote From Pro: A nice upbeat piece with an interesting arrangement

WAY BACK by Toby Tune

Toby Tune

Broadjam Artist: Toby Tune
Song: WAY BACK

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Alex Johnston (Music Supervisor, Composer, Producer)

Pro General Comments: This is an upbeat piece that creates a good mood. There are syncopated and counterpoint patterns and rhythms that make the arrangement interesting. Its starts with the almost arpeggiated piano chords, over a long legato cello which immediately sets of the arrangement. The brass phrase off set against the Erhu that sounds like the chinese violin is a unique way of delivery. Pan pipes join with a counterpoint melody that catches the ear and helps to evoke a different feeling, then whole thing then joins together for a nice dynamic crescendo before it drops with what appear to be tubas or French horns and a small filtered drum loop plays in the left ear as if anticipating more coming, ust before the powerful drums kit in and again we have another dynamic lift. So a really good set up musically and dynamically. The song it is most powerful at this point and with extra kick drum added it feel like the songs is riding on a across the chinese grasslands headin for the sun and then a nice SFX ending. My only thoughts are this. Dont be too clever in arranging pieces, remember that a lot of Music Supervisors are not all top notch musicians and arrangers so they might see it as too complicated or not understand it, but Stick to you principles.The other main thought is if you hired a trumpet player and a violist rather than used sample banks that would have made the song 60x better in its quality of sound and it would sound amazing, its worth spending a little bit on friends you know who might play but would really help it to stand out and in the industry in every level people are trying to be noticed and different you have the chance to with a few changes.Overall and enjoyable listen with choice of instrumentation excellent and a clever yet tricky arrangement.Nice WorkMuch LoveAlexCMI Music Group

Quote From Pro: A nice upbeat piece with an interesting arrangement

Someone like you – Studio Demo by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Someone like you - Studio Demo

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.Again you have a nice vibe going on in your songs. Uptempo, positive songs are usually the type artists are looking for. The recording has a good energy and beat. Good choice in production.In the prechorus - the vocal seems to be going down on the phrase "I'm moving up"- the verse should build tension in the pre- to explode in the chorus. If you are singing about moving up- the melody- phrase should move up as well.Find a great co-writer to help you make your lyrics shine. I like the ideas and concepts you are going for- but they are a little off in English. Such as "divined emotions", "loving fever"- not really something we would say. Lyrics call for everyday speech and this is a bit awkward. I'm surprised the vocalist /producer didn't tell you this.When you say "I've never met someone like you" - tell us why- why are they one of a kind? We want some more details to really care. Make us interested. Are they for eg- the first one who really listened? Finished your sentences? Like the same things as you? Love your quirks? Right now that person- "someone" is a bit vague. The more details- the more interested we become.In modern songs and more and more in movies- the audience likes to see a strong woman. When you ask your subject "to not back away" - but then say you are devoted to them- you risk making the singer look weak. Why would you give someone devotion- if they haven't "yet" returned the same emotion? Just something to think about. It's a little confusing.The chorus could have a bit more contrast- in the melody- it feels a bit too close to the verse/pre chorus. You really want it to build and stand out.The singer has a nice attitude to bring out your song. She projects a good energy to help sell your ideas.Once again- try to look for that fresh lyrical angle- to really make the song as best as it can be. You are doing all the right things- it's just a natural evolution of fine tuning things. Keep up the good work!

Quote From Pro: Songwriter has a good instinct for upbeat tunes.

Someone like you – Studio Demo by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Someone like you - Studio Demo

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.Again you have a nice vibe going on in your songs. Uptempo, positive songs are usually the type artists are looking for. The recording has a good energy and beat. Good choice in production.In the prechorus - the vocal seems to be going down on the phrase "I'm moving up"- the verse should build tension in the pre- to explode in the chorus. If you are singing about moving up- the melody- phrase should move up as well.Find a great co-writer to help you make your lyrics shine. I like the ideas and concepts you are going for- but they are a little off in English. Such as "divined emotions", "loving fever"- not really something we would say. Lyrics call for everyday speech and this is a bit awkward. I'm surprised the vocalist /producer didn't tell you this.When you say "I've never met someone like you" - tell us why- why are they one of a kind? We want some more details to really care. Make us interested. Are they for eg- the first one who really listened? Finished your sentences? Like the same things as you? Love your quirks? Right now that person- "someone" is a bit vague. The more details- the more interested we become.In modern songs and more and more in movies- the audience likes to see a strong woman. When you ask your subject "to not back away" - but then say you are devoted to them- you risk making the singer look weak. Why would you give someone devotion- if they haven't "yet" returned the same emotion? Just something to think about. It's a little confusing.The chorus could have a bit more contrast- in the melody- it feels a bit too close to the verse/pre chorus. You really want it to build and stand out.The singer has a nice attitude to bring out your song. She projects a good energy to help sell your ideas.Once again- try to look for that fresh lyrical angle- to really make the song as best as it can be. You are doing all the right things- it's just a natural evolution of fine tuning things. Keep up the good work!

Quote From Pro: Songwriter has a good instinct for upbeat tunes.

Because Of You – Studio Demo by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Because Of You - Studio Demo

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.This song has good production and arrangements. The vocal is polished and has a nice energy.. The backgrounds enhance the song as well. The tone of the piece is joyful and has a good feel to it. You seem to have a natural flair for making your melody rise and fall like it should-so that your hook comes in like it should. The one thing you learn in songwriting-is - in order to make a song as interesting as can be- introduce CONFLICT. That is why people rush to the Enquirer- to read the gossip and intrigue of star's daily lives. It's the same in a song -give us some drama. Introduce tension as much as possible.You can still make it sweet- but it could be sweeter if for example you said "I've been watching you for the longest time... can't believe today you're finally mine"- start out with the singer pining for (for eg)- her best friend- and afraid to tell him. By the end of the song- she tells him only to discover that he's been feeling the same way. That way your audience is waiting to the end to hear what will happen.You do have a hint of conflict- however it's a little vague- it seems first you are searching for the person and then in the chorus- you seem to have met them. Fill us in on the details. How did they all of a sudden appear? Maybe they were there all along and you just realized it? Just a few words could accomplish this.You have a nice vibe going on in the song. I would find a song that you love that is similar. Play them back to back. Really study them. How can you make it more like the hit? Could the arrangement have more dynamics- what are they doing differently.? This song has a bit of a dated feel to it- you might want to add a few more instruments/loops to give it a bit more of a modern feel.This is a Monica song you may want to listen to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eOuK-pYhy4You have to ask yourself- how can you make your song stand out from the pack? How do you make the competition disappear? What are you saying that other songs aren't?Lines such as "I can see a change" suggest you should work with an English cowriter- to help you with your phrasing. It seems like you want to say "I feel a change".... Another thing "sweetest joy". Joy is already sweet- so you don't have to say "sweetest"- since it's redundant. Perhaps "wildest" joy- which would suggest something a bit different. In songwriting you only have so many words- so you want to maximize the potential of each word. Also for eg- your heart "is colored with the sweetest joy"- Joy doesn't really "color" a heart. It might fill it up .. but color is not really the right phrase here. The phrase seems a little much in English. Try for some fun rhyme schemes. Instead of repeating "because of you" over and over- find a good rhyme to make it even stronger. Eg- "you know it's true- you changed my life- it's all because of you- the world is so brand new... because of you- Different rhymes add more life to a chorus. Brand new has probably been used too many times in songs- but you get the idea.I can see a good progression, Keep on going! Good luck.

Quote From Pro: MoBack has a great song -vibe going on here.

Because Of You – Studio Demo by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Because Of You - Studio Demo

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.This song has good production and arrangements. The vocal is polished and has a nice energy.. The backgrounds enhance the song as well. The tone of the piece is joyful and has a good feel to it. You seem to have a natural flair for making your melody rise and fall like it should-so that your hook comes in like it should. The one thing you learn in songwriting-is - in order to make a song as interesting as can be- introduce CONFLICT. That is why people rush to the Enquirer- to read the gossip and intrigue of star's daily lives. It's the same in a song -give us some drama. Introduce tension as much as possible.You can still make it sweet- but it could be sweeter if for example you said "I've been watching you for the longest time... can't believe today you're finally mine"- start out with the singer pining for (for eg)- her best friend- and afraid to tell him. By the end of the song- she tells him only to discover that he's been feeling the same way. That way your audience is waiting to the end to hear what will happen.You do have a hint of conflict- however it's a little vague- it seems first you are searching for the person and then in the chorus- you seem to have met them. Fill us in on the details. How did they all of a sudden appear? Maybe they were there all along and you just realized it? Just a few words could accomplish this.You have a nice vibe going on in the song. I would find a song that you love that is similar. Play them back to back. Really study them. How can you make it more like the hit? Could the arrangement have more dynamics- what are they doing differently.? This song has a bit of a dated feel to it- you might want to add a few more instruments/loops to give it a bit more of a modern feel.This is a Monica song you may want to listen to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eOuK-pYhy4You have to ask yourself- how can you make your song stand out from the pack? How do you make the competition disappear? What are you saying that other songs aren't?Lines such as "I can see a change" suggest you should work with an English cowriter- to help you with your phrasing. It seems like you want to say "I feel a change".... Another thing "sweetest joy". Joy is already sweet- so you don't have to say "sweetest"- since it's redundant. Perhaps "wildest" joy- which would suggest something a bit different. In songwriting you only have so many words- so you want to maximize the potential of each word. Also for eg- your heart "is colored with the sweetest joy"- Joy doesn't really "color" a heart. It might fill it up .. but color is not really the right phrase here. The phrase seems a little much in English. Try for some fun rhyme schemes. Instead of repeating "because of you" over and over- find a good rhyme to make it even stronger. Eg- "you know it's true- you changed my life- it's all because of you- the world is so brand new... because of you- Different rhymes add more life to a chorus. Brand new has probably been used too many times in songs- but you get the idea.I can see a good progression, Keep on going! Good luck.

Quote From Pro: MoBack has a great song -vibe going on here.

Set me free – Basic Home Recording by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Set me free - Basic Home Recording

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.Hi Mo Back: It's great you know how to demo up your song basics. You get across the vibe of your song very well which is a great to be able to hand to a producer. It also portrays the energy that you are conjuring up as well. You might be able to push the tempo and make it a bit faster- to add a bit more energy.It's always good to experiment and come up with interesting angles such as the phone machine which sets the tone of the piece. Nice touch.This demo needs polish on the vocal track- you would need someone who can really help you make your vocal stand out, be aware of pitch and generate a great vibe. Since you already indicated it's just a demo I'm sure you realize that this sounds like a "rough" and hopefully you can find someone to work with that brings out this strength, attitude and polish in a final vocal. It needs fine tuning to really make it shine.The other area that I would suggest you find someone to help you fine tune your lyrics which in places seem a bit strange in English- certain phrases that we wouldn't really say in English -such as: "Now it's too late to recall"- might be better such as "Now - it's too late to turn back".....Other things in lyrics that is always good is to be specific- give us some details- "You gave me the sign, that you'd no longer be mine".... What was the sign? Details add interest and draw your listener in. For eg- you could say something like- "You never look me in the eye- or "You're drifting away", etc.. Things that suggest that it's over.... These kind of details make your song have more depth and be more interesting.You always have to search for ways to make a lyric "fresh" -something no one's ever said before. This isn't easy. Let us know how/why it ended as well to make us care. Otherwise we just think the person was a jerk and we don't really care. But if you say- "You were my best friend".... We feel for the singer. She lost something of value.Give us the who/what/why/when and where. It's good to have a "strong woman" stance in songs nowadays. She's moving on- this is good- she's not sitting around crying. However saying "I'm special being loved by someone else"- sounds like the singer is getting her own self worth by being loved. Instead it would be stronger if she said something more along the lines of - "Someone else realizes I'm special, too bad you didn't- you're missing out"..... So she's basically showing the person who left her- that she's already special- and it's too bad- but someone else can see it. This would be stronger.It's good that your story progresses and she is now with someone new. It's always good to have the story move along and change by the end.Listeners want to identify with a strong role model. So there are just some lyric tweaks that someone else might be able to help you with -to fine tune everything.Try to work as many rhymes as you can into your hook.But good work- you have a nice beginning of a song. You have good instincts. Good luck with it!

Quote From Pro: Mo Back has good musical instincts and energy- can't wait to see what she comes up with next.

Set me free – Basic Home Recording by MoBack

MoBack

Broadjam Artist: MoBack
Song: Set me free - Basic Home Recording

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
Diana Williamson (Songwriter, Music Supervisor)

Pro General Comments: Please note I don't rate individual instrumentation since my expertise lies more in marketability, lyric, melody, and overall performance.Hi Mo Back: It's great you know how to demo up your song basics. You get across the vibe of your song very well which is a great to be able to hand to a producer. It also portrays the energy that you are conjuring up as well. You might be able to push the tempo and make it a bit faster- to add a bit more energy.It's always good to experiment and come up with interesting angles such as the phone machine which sets the tone of the piece. Nice touch.This demo needs polish on the vocal track- you would need someone who can really help you make your vocal stand out, be aware of pitch and generate a great vibe. Since you already indicated it's just a demo I'm sure you realize that this sounds like a "rough" and hopefully you can find someone to work with that brings out this strength, attitude and polish in a final vocal. It needs fine tuning to really make it shine.The other area that I would suggest you find someone to help you fine tune your lyrics which in places seem a bit strange in English- certain phrases that we wouldn't really say in English -such as: "Now it's too late to recall"- might be better such as "Now - it's too late to turn back".....Other things in lyrics that is always good is to be specific- give us some details- "You gave me the sign, that you'd no longer be mine".... What was the sign? Details add interest and draw your listener in. For eg- you could say something like- "You never look me in the eye- or "You're drifting away", etc.. Things that suggest that it's over.... These kind of details make your song have more depth and be more interesting.You always have to search for ways to make a lyric "fresh" -something no one's ever said before. This isn't easy. Let us know how/why it ended as well to make us care. Otherwise we just think the person was a jerk and we don't really care. But if you say- "You were my best friend".... We feel for the singer. She lost something of value.Give us the who/what/why/when and where. It's good to have a "strong woman" stance in songs nowadays. She's moving on- this is good- she's not sitting around crying. However saying "I'm special being loved by someone else"- sounds like the singer is getting her own self worth by being loved. Instead it would be stronger if she said something more along the lines of - "Someone else realizes I'm special, too bad you didn't- you're missing out"..... So she's basically showing the person who left her- that she's already special- and it's too bad- but someone else can see it. This would be stronger.It's good that your story progresses and she is now with someone new. It's always good to have the story move along and change by the end.Listeners want to identify with a strong role model. So there are just some lyric tweaks that someone else might be able to help you with -to fine tune everything.Try to work as many rhymes as you can into your hook.But good work- you have a nice beginning of a song. You have good instincts. Good luck with it!

Quote From Pro: Mo Back has good musical instincts and energy- can't wait to see what she comes up with next.

Searching by Tony DeSimone

Tony DeSimone

Broadjam Artist: Tony DeSimone
Song: Searching

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
John Anderson (Publisher)

Pro General Comments: I think that this song definitely has a hook and is very catchy. The verses fit in nicely with the chorus, yet are distinguishable enough not to be confused with the chorus. It is the type of song that will get stuck in the listener's head, which says a lot about how catchy the chorus is. I think that this could probably be rerecorded or remixed. The vocals are very heavy as well as the plucked banjo part, which was distracting. I think that the song would flow more if the mix were more polished. The recording itself sounds well done. Other than that, the instrumentation fit the song nicely, and added to the emotions of the song. The hook may be enhanced by some backup vocals in the chorus to add some depth. Because of it's happy vibe and uplifting lyrics, I think that it would be a great song for many different kinds of commercials or family-friendly sitcoms. I could also see it being used in trailers for comedies or other uplifting movies. However, there are a lot of songs like this in the market, so the challenge will be distinguishing this song from the rest of the pop world.

Quote From Pro: Tony DeSimone delivers a feel good anthemic pop/rock track that warms the heart. It's convincing on all levels, and leaves you wanting more.

Searching by Tony DeSimone

Tony DeSimone

Broadjam Artist: Tony DeSimone
Song: Searching

Broadjam Pro Reviewer:
John Anderson (Publisher)

Pro General Comments: I think that this song definitely has a hook and is very catchy. The verses fit in nicely with the chorus, yet are distinguishable enough not to be confused with the chorus. It is the type of song that will get stuck in the listener's head, which says a lot about how catchy the chorus is. I think that this could probably be rerecorded or remixed. The vocals are very heavy as well as the plucked banjo part, which was distracting. I think that the song would flow more if the mix were more polished. The recording itself sounds well done. Other than that, the instrumentation fit the song nicely, and added to the emotions of the song. The hook may be enhanced by some backup vocals in the chorus to add some depth. Because of it's happy vibe and uplifting lyrics, I think that it would be a great song for many different kinds of commercials or family-friendly sitcoms. I could also see it being used in trailers for comedies or other uplifting movies. However, there are a lot of songs like this in the market, so the challenge will be distinguishing this song from the rest of the pop world.

Quote From Pro: Tony DeSimone delivers a feel good anthemic pop/rock track that warms the heart. It's convincing on all levels, and leaves you wanting more.